I was surprised recently when someone whom I know is in financial trouble himself emailed me with news of another person’s financial and personal struggles. He said he thought I’d be ‘interested’, as the person and I had previously had some negative interchanges. What the hell?
Truly, it struck me as ghoulish, almost akin to dancing on someone’s grave, to receive this attempted encouragement to delight in someone else’s downfall. No thanks.
I saw this road safety sign on the Desert Road on my way to be with family, and agreed with the sentiment, and also the point of view …
The longer I live, the more I learn that EMPATHY is the factor that sets people apart as truly human. What does it take for us to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes before we condemn them?
Sometimes, (many times?) the kindest thing to do in any situation is tell the truth. i.e. Not to make excuses or pardon or ‘cover’ someone else’s sin or offence, but to find a way to speak the truth — even the harsh, judgemental truth — with compassion.
So as we count down to 2011, here’s to the whistle-blowers who overcame their squeamishness and fear, who took their courage in their hands, who overcame their desire to be ‘liked’ (i.e. to avoid criticism) to give their gifts in 2010.
And let’s hear it for those who can reprove without condemnation, and oppose without totally losing their empathy for those whose behaviour they judge.
Well said, Peter, both on empathy and whistle-blowers. It seems to have taken me forever to understand both points because they are so understated and usually very under-rated.
I really only thought about empathy after seeing the 2000 movie, “Nuremberg”, which featured a Jewish psychologist trying to understand the character of the Nazi defendants. When he summarised his first-hamd observations to define evil as the complete absence of empathy, I was initially disappointed. Now I agree, and for a multitude of reasons.
Re whistle-blowers, the consequences are often very painful for everyone, sadly not just for those being exposed but especially for those blowing the whistle. Sometimes it’s many years before their acting is appreciated.
So, well said. Hope your holiday was refreshing!
Thanks for your comment Graeme. It’s a big topic, empathy, isn’t it? And crucial for us on all sorts of levels.
I’m reading a book which in part comments in detail on the skulduggery and corruption within political parties in NZ … ghastly what can become of us when we disassociate our actions from their consequences.
Go well. – P
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